High School mein pyaar sabko hota hai: kabhi best friend ke saath, kabhi jis ladki ke saath chidaya jaata hai aur kabhi new-admission waale ladke ke saath.
There is something sweet and innocent about high school love that makes the adults melt up when they hear about it unless their children are the ones involved, then it becomes a boiled-down version of Romeo and Juliet.
It’s not all sweet and simple, though. High school relationships, like their adult counterparts, can get very complicated and riddled with problems. These manifest in various forms, including:
- Relationships negatively impacting friendships with friends
- Falling of your CGPA/Grade
- Parental Pressures
- School Management’s futile attempts to separate couples
But all of this can be resolved, if you just give each other space.
When we fall in love for the first time, the desire to be together is so strong that we cannot do or think about anything else. Couples are usually found sitting on the same desk (much to the suspicion of the teacher), or constantly on WhatsApp or Facebook when out of school. Soon, everything (even lunchboxes) is shared. And this is the root of most problems.
“Josh and I spend so much time together already that we figured… Why not get surgically conjoined?” (Man Seeking Woman)
Being together all the time means that you do not have enough time to spend with your friends and they start disliking your girlfriend/boyfriend. Constantly wanting to be together can put you off other pursuits, like…umm…what’s the word…it starts with an S…yes, Studying!
This is where both the parents and the school management get involved. Teachers believe it is their moral duty to keep you two apart for even as less as the duration of a class period.
And casual observation suggests the ones who score well in their exams are always left alone by teachers. The reason for this is simple; the police dogs won’t go around sniffing for trouble if they do not have a reason to be suspicious.
You might be thinking: “So, I must score 95% to keep a relationship from getting complicated? SURE.” Well, not really.
Attempting to top the class with no previous acts of academic excellence and no desire to study would make you scoff at this suggestion. But there is another way, a much simpler way: GIVE EACH OTHER SPACE.
Now, you might say: “So, you mean to say that to be together, we have to NOT be together?”
Exactly! Let the relationship not eclipse your life’s other goals when you fall in love. Rise in love and let your relationship support and build on your goals.
The thumb rule to do this is simple: For every minute together, spend two minutes apart.
-Sit with that close friend of yours you haven’t had a “chance” to talk to for a long time.
-Allot time to your homework.
-When parents see that you’re not glued to your phone, they’ll back off.
-Turning in assignments on time will make the teachers back off too.
-As your grades rise to a respectable level, the suspicions will go down.
BUT THIS ISN’T EVEN THE BEST PART.
-Being apart gives you more time to find and follow your passions.
Teenage is the decade of self-awareness and this makes us question ‘Who we are’ and ‘What we want from this World’. You explore your body and your mind.
Also, figuring out a career for your self does not involve simply choosing Science/Commerce/Arts as school pass-outs might suggest. It involves exploring all three streams before making a decision. You do this by trying out new things in different fields; having experiences you’ve never had before and meeting new people, whose ideas and thoughts will help you open your mind.
Now imagine this: When you’re back home after a great day of adventure, you’ll call up your girlfriend/boyfriend and you’ll actually have something to say to them, and not just talk about homework or play a game of who can say I-love-you the most.
You will share each other’s experiences and also learn from the other person. When you talk about what motivated you today, what irritated you, the person who inspired you and what you wish to make of your life, you’ll grow as people and you’ll grow closer to each other. And, isn’t growing up together the point after all?